Precognitive dreams

I also have occasional precognitive dreams. Nothing dramatic- just small events in my everyday life. For instance, I mostly see words during hypnopompia and I later come across them during my writing or research. For instances, I recently saw the word ‘Dadu’. At that time I did not know what it meant and later during my research on the saint poet Kabir, I came across a reference to the sect of Dadu Panthis who are followers of Kabir. On another occasion, I saw a bright pink saree during hypnogogia and later I came across a photo of one of my relatives wearing the same saree !! The photo was taken recently so the possibility of my having seen the photograph some time in the past and then dreaming about it is ruled out. Recently, I accidentally discovered that I could see a bright golden aura like globes around lighted candles in a dim room. I could not see this earlier.

Orgone or Human Aura ?

Gradually I also began to see luminescent dots of light darting about in the air. These were different from floaters. Floaters are supposed to be suspended particles in our eye fluid. Many people can see them drifting in front of their vision when they look towards the sky and defocus their eyes. I can see the luminescent darting dots more clearly when the sun is closer to the horizon and the sky is not too brightly lit. I can see them even when it is raining. There movement does not seem to be effected by the weather. However their visibility to the human eye seems to be effected by light conditions. There are various theories on the inter net about these luminescent dots. Some say it is orgone energy – the building blocks of life on earth. Some think that it is a kind of optical illusion that is related to migraine aura. But I can see them even when I am not having a headache.
I later came across the following account from the book ‘ The Human Aura’ by Swami Panchadasi on the Project Gutenberg website : ……‘Another peculiarity of the prana-aura is that it is filled with a multitude of extremely minute sparkling particles, resembling tiny electric sparks, which are in constant motion. These sparks, which are visible to persons of only slightly developed psychic power, impart a vibratory motion to the prana-aura which, under certain conditions is plainly visible to the average person. This vibratory movement is akin to the movement of heated air arising from a hot stove, or from the heated earth on a mid-summer day.’
This is exactly what I have been seeing.

Past life memories ?

“Both you and I have taken many births, I remember them all, O Arjun, but you do not remember.”
- Shri Krishna to Arjun in the Bhagavat Geeta

The phenomenon of visual hypnogogis gradually became less frequent and I begun to experience something else. Just before I fell asleep scenes, sometime with people in them, begun to ‘pop up’ randomly in my mind I use the word ‘pop up’ for a lack of a more appropriate word. The difference between this and hypnogogia, was that while hypnogogia seemed as if I was sensing something outside of me, these scenes seem to come to the surface from somewhere deep within me, like some long lost memories. However they were strange to me because I did not seem to have any conscious memory of having visited those locations or having met those people. It was almost as if somebody else’s memories had been put in my head !! On one occasion I saw a child climbing some dimly lit staircases. He seemed to be wearing modern western clothes. In another occasion I saw a young man riding a motorcycle across a field. He seemed to have western features. On another occasion I was a young boy sitting on a ramshackle bridge which overlooked some kind of a big dug out pit. On another occasion I was a small child with a woman who appeared to be my mother. We were sitting atop a dome shaped building, and some kind of a commotion seemed to be happening below us. When I recollect, from the look of the people around me, it was probably a time period of 18th century. On another occasion I was a young man (westerner) named Illad, there was a radio in the room, this model was in use during the period of the Second World War. Somebody seemed to be calling out my name and was backing against the wall in fear. There are numerous such instances and I have written them down in my diary in detail, sometimes with sketches. In a lot of these scenes I seem to be an outsider looking at the scene and in some, as in the above mentioned case, paradoxical as it may sound, I was both the character and the onlooker. So I was both Illad as well as someone who was looking at this scene from ‘outside’. As if my consciousness was at two places at the same time!! The question is are these past life memories?

Hypnogogia and Hypnopompia

I began to grow more sensitive to the world around and within me at the age of 44. This was also a period when I had begun to suffer from severe anemia and chronic fatigue. I do not know whether this was a mere coincidence or a trigger for the latent abilities to begun to develop in me. It was not all like the dramatic accounts of sudden development of clairvoyance among people, which we come across in books and other media. It was slow and gradual, and in bursts. During this period I was living alone in Delhi with my two sons. My husband was away on a foreign assignment. So apart from the health problem there were other stresses and tensions that I had to deal with. It started with very vivid visual hypnogogia and hypnopompia (please see the Appendix page for explanation of these terms). I would see outdoor locations, landscapes, inside of houses. One incident of hypnopompia that I can still visualize in detail was an old European- mansion like building. I seem to be looking at it from the top, as if my consciousness was floating above it and I could look at it from various angles. The image was crystal clear and life like. In fact it would not be an exaggeration to say that it appeared more real than real life!! I started seeing these images quite often - almost twice or thrice a week. There was no pattern to it. Nor was it under my control. Sometimes it would seem as if I was looking through or telescope/tunnel. Sometimes the images were in miniature. Some times strangely illuminated faces seem to materialize in front of my closed eyes just before I fell asleep.

My background

As a child I have always had very vivid dreams. I would often write down the interesting ones in my diary. Apart from a single attack of claustrophia, when I was about 3 or 4 years old I have had a fairly normal childhood. I am not able to recollect much about this incident apart from the fact that I was lying in my mother’s lap crying and saying that I felt suffocated while the walls of the room seem to be caving in on me. I grew up in a Hindu Brahmin family in Delhi, India. Mine was not a very religious family, fairly modern and moderate in views and attitudes. I grew up with an open mind, with no set beliefs or prejudices.

The occult beliefs and concepts written and 'studied' profusely by Madam Blavatsky's Theosophical school of thought are well known. While i have great regard for some of the luminaries who belonged to this school and thier dedication to the subject of Occult is noteworthy, I have often felt that some of thier concepts are oversimplified or sometimes a bit far fetched. I personally believe that the subject of occult/paranormal phenomenon can only be studied objectively if you are without any perjudice of harbour any preconvieved notion. Secondly and more importantly, in order to have some belief in the existence of these things, you must have a first hand experience of it. In my 'study' I have tried to collate my experiences and instincts with those of others who have had similar experiences and all have different explainaitons and beliefs for it. Afcourse, as human we are all conditioned and programmed by our environment and the kind of people and thought we are exposed to throughout our lives, hence some bias is boud to creep in and cannot be entirely avoided.

Occult : the hidden forces of life

All that transpires on earth and all beyond
Are parts of an illimitable plan
The One keeps in his heart and knows alone.
Our outward happenings have their seed within,
And even this random Fate that imitates Chance,
This mass of unintelligible results,
Are the dumb graph of truths that work unseen;
The laws of the Unknown create the known.
Absorbed in routine of daily acts,
Our eyes are fixed on an external scene;
We hear the crash of the wheels of Circumstances
And wonder at the hidden cause of things.
Our conscious movements have sealed origins
But with those shadowy seats no converse hold;
No understanding binds our comrade parts;
Our acts emerge from a crypt our minds ignore,
Our deepest depths are ignorant of themselves;
Even our body is a mystery shop;
As our earth’s roots lurk screened below our earth,
So lie unseen our roots of mind and life.
Our springs are kept close hid beneath, within;
Our souls are moverd by powers behind the wall,
In the subterranean reaches of the spirit
A puissance acts and recks not what it means;
Using unthinking monitors and scribes,
It is the casue of what we think and feel…….

- Shri Aurobindo